Things that make me laugh

I know classified adds aren't supposed to make me laugh, but our newspaper here doesn't have the word limits like in the states, so people are more animated and narrate so much more than I'm used to and they make me laugh.

Listed under AUTOS WANTED:

Looking for a van to transform into an aviation squadron icon. Must be big on character/seating and small on price/stench with the ability to transport lots of people at one time. Contact Mr X at (gives Japanese #). No one will ask your name.

Listed under AUTOS FOR SALE:
1995 Honda Odyssey with 55,000 km. Great car with nothing wrong except was rear-ended and insurance claimed a total loss. Still drivable and insurance good for 9 more months. Make me an offer, could be a usedul car until insurance is due, then junked.
Oh, and the other day I saw a Japanese man with a receding hairline and a very long mullet! Ha, and were did I see him? Costco. Oh yeah, I couldn't get a picture of him without being very obvious, but it made my day!

Last but not least...

Written in English for all the Japanese to figure out how to use a western toilet.
Lots of laughs for all!