Sarah's first day of Kindergarten

She looks so big to me

Sophie might be a little excited too...



Mrs Comp is in the middle, we love her

It's official!

The little girl next to her burst into tears and I think that's when Sarah started getting nervous, and that's when I started crying. I knew I would at some point, was just hoping to get out of her classroom first.

Really nervous now, mommy has to leave.

Kids in her class, only 16!

Plan for the day, I wish I were her. My schedule is to go to the BX and post office. Wow...

Choosing a school for Sarah was difficult, I think this is one of the biggest responsibilities I've felt as a parent. Everything until now seemed important, but this seemed so big to me. It was strange to have to defend myself as to why I wouldn't home-school Sarah. It was a simple decision, we would kill each other in the course of the first day as she is a perfectionist who gives up too easy and I am too laid back that we would still be in our PJ's at noon with nothing done.

Rumors abound in a small place like Yokota, you hear the worst first and that is scary for mom. Aaron and I had a difficult time trying to find the right place for her. I did so much research on this, I called tons of schools, talked to so many broken English speaking nationals and got so frustrated at the outrageous costs of Japanese schools that our choice was one of two. We would send her to school on base or keep her at Yochien (her Japanese preschool she was attending).

Japan doesn't have kindergarten, they keep kids in Yochien until the are 6 then they start them in elementary school. Sarah is a perfectionist and we didn't want to start her off in 1st grade and have her a little behind, she would be so frustrated she would give up. That left us with on base Kindergarten. It seems like this was our last resort. I hated that it seemed that way, but I really started praying about this. Sometimes what we fear the most is something we have to do. So our prayer was that she find a great teacher, one that would be sensitive to her needs, be encouraging to her when she felt like giving up and one that would understand her when she was having a difficult time. We were also nervous about the class size, last year the kindergarten classes were filled with tons of kids 26-28 in each class with one teacher and a very part time aide.

God knows what we want and He reminded me that Sarah is His child too and that he is not only in control but aware of what she needs so much more than my own awareness. I was able to meet some of the teachers early and get a feel for them, I was also able to let the administrator know what Sarah was like so they could place her with the right teacher. This was something that was challenging for me. I have been dealing with controlling things. This felt like I was taking control of the situation and making God take the back seat. I felt God was teaching me that there are things I can do, but do them knowing and acknowledging He knows best. My attitude was to let the administration know who Sarah was while prayerfully setting the direction squarely in God's hands knowing I can trust Him.

The result: We met Mrs Comp, an answer to our prayers. She is kind, loves giving hugs, will be sensitive to Sarah and her perfectionism and great at encouraging her. She has a full kitchen in her classroom and she builds her reading or math into her cooking projects. I am so in love with all of it and it's a God size match for Sarah. The other answer to prayer is that she is only one of 16 kids and they now have a full time aide in her class with an open door policy for parents. There are so many things God provided Sarah that I am so thrilled to be sending her to school. Does this mean I didn't cry? Oh no, I didn't get out of her classroom before tears started welling and my voice started to give the tell-tail sign that they were coming soon. I left a nervous scared but excited 5 year old piece of my heart squarely where it should be- in kindergarten!