The commissary

OK, those in the military can totally relate to the commissary experience, and believe me it is an experience. It takes a great deal of mental fortitude to bring myself to enter the doors of that place. Why do I go? Well, I like to save money, some of the stuff is a great deal, others, well, not really, but its a great perk for us in the military, IF you can force yourself in the doors. I know there are lessons with anything like this, some are universal to the grocery shopping experience, some are not, but here are some lessons learned-very quickly,I might add - when shopping at the commissary:

NEVER NEVER NEVER go on the Saturday after payday... NEVER!!!

Go to the bathroom as you enter the doors, you never know who you will be following while you are trudging up and down the aisle. I don't know why it is, but it never seems to fail that you always see the same handful of people as you shop. It doesn't matter how fast or slow you go, you just see the same faces. I try to make friends with my fellow shoppers, it seems to make the experience better all around, especially those with kids.

And speaking of kids, bring snacks, it cuts down on the "I want"s and keeps them occupied.

The elderly, well, they are tricky. The don't have much to occupy their day apparently, because they sit and stare at the shelves, pick up an item, roll it around in their hands, put it down, take something else off the shelf and repeat this over and over and over... until they are satisfied with their selection. This isn't usually a problem, but they are so notorious about parking their cart on one side of the aisle and standing on the other side totally blocking the aisle. AHHH. Oh my goodness, it really tests the patience. Heaven forbid you have a squirmy, impatient child (or children) in the cart with you, boy can you get some looks. Somewhere on this world wide web there is a little old lady complaining about the mom's who bring their unruly kids to the commissary while they are trying to shop... This is where it's a good idea to go potty as you start shopping, because you know you will see them on every aisle. OK, rant over...

It's never a good sign when there are trucks parked in the parking lot with coolers in the back, you know they will empty all the shelves as they go.

There are never any new items.

You get used to finding one particular item that you can only find at the commissary then they stop selling it.

They are always closed on Mondays, holidays and the day after holidays.

Only open until 7.

Sundays and Thursdays are the best days to go.

Holidays, well, it's like any other store, yikes...

Men shopping at the commissary... I find them so funny. Here are some overheard conversations...

One dad speaking to his little boy, "Darn, I know we need coffee, what kind does she get? Oh, I can't remember, well, I guess I will have to call her again." Reaches for the cell phone-we are on aisle 3- "Ah, yeah, it's me again, we need coffee, what do you usually get? Umm... Umm... Oh... well, I'm looking... no, I don't see it... it's beside what?... green or red?... Oh, there it is. Yeah we are fine...you know while I am shopping, I'm going to get whatever I want that's not on the list, right? Yeah, talk to you in a minute I'm sure. Bye. I hate shopping for your mom..."

An elderly gentleman was standing confused as he searched for Kleenex, "excuse me ma'am, my wife sent me with this list and this coupon, what does she want? I can't figure it out, she is so picky". With a little help we figure it out together, them he says "next time she can come." I say,"it's a good thing we were just as picky choosing our men." He smiled and said thanks.

Guess where I was today?